


ppbpbpbpbpbppbpbppppbpbpbppbpbpbpbpbppbpbpbppbpbpbpbpbp

by Latia



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Gen, awkward teen fumbling, cybering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-18
Updated: 2012-08-18
Packaged: 2017-11-12 10:29:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/489868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latia/pseuds/Latia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Things go terribly, horribly wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	ppbpbpbpbpbppbpbppppbpbpbppbpbpbpbpbppbpbpbppbpbpbpbpbp

EB: okay so,  
EB: i guess i start by kissing you kind of lightly.  
EB: (on the mouth!! in case that wasn't obvious.)  
TT: (Thanks for the clarification, for a second I was worrying your delicate lips might have found your way to my eyeballs.)  
EB: (:P)  
TT: I kiss back, a little not-so-lightly.  
TT: My hands may or may not migrate towards the back pockets of your trousers.  
EB: (:O)  
EB: well in that case my hands totally go in for your back pockets as well! miss smarty seer.  
EB: and by back pockets i mean your back parts.  
EB: that is to say, um  
EB: your butt.  
TT: Oh my.  
TT: I dare say I may have been struck by a case of the vapors.  
TT: I fear I might be in for a swoon.  
EB: oh no!!!  
EB: luckily i am there to pull off a sweet catch.  
EB: which i do.  
TT: Lucky me.  
EB: :D  
EB: i mean, i smile. because i am there where you are right now and i am not forgetting i can't use emoticons irl. (sorry.)  
TT: (It's fine.)  
EB: uhhhh so then i sort of  
EB: uh,  
EB: lay you down  
EB: on any sort of bed-esque object that might be near by.  
TT: I raise my eyebrows at you from my position on said bed-esque object.  
TT: The look on my face seems to inquire "What now? Is he planning to take the lead?" In any case, I slide my sweater down slightly in order to expose my delicate shoulder blades, along with a peek of the straps of my black brassiere.  
EB: oh geez  
EB: i mean, i say 'oh geez'.  
EB: so i lay down with you.  
EB: or, on you i guess. i'm above you. and i grin down at you, because you look so cute like that.  
EB: er, or beautiful i guess  
EB: i mean not i guess!!!!! i know!  
EB: ughhhh. just say something.  
EB:  
EB: ...  
EB: uh hello, rose?  
TT: Sorry, someone was bothering me.  
TT: I stroke you from your chest down to your belly. As I do so I smile back up at you. Possibly because you are very endearing, and charming, and maybe just a bit handsome.  
EB: :D  
TT: My hand comes to rest between your thighs.  
EB: oh  
EB: well i kind of jump at that a bit! because i really wasn't expecting it.   
EB: but it's a good kind of not-expecting. it feels good.  
EB: uuuhhh so i wiggle my eyebrows at you and say  
EB: um  
EB: "i hope you're in the mood for sausage."  
EB: oh godfgg no no no no do over  
EB: i'm sorry oh jesus that was awful  
EB: okay.  
EB: i say "before you ask, it's not a gun. i'm just happy to see you."  
EB: (ugggh sorry i suck at this)  
EB:  
EB: ...  
EB: . . .  
EB: . . .  
EB: rose come on!! i wasn't that bad!  
EB: come on don't leave me hanging! this was your idea!  
EB: bluuuuuuuuh  
EB: okay if you don't respond in ten seconds i'm gonna start motorboating you and when you come back i won't do anything but that!  
EB: i'm totally going to do it!  
EB: five....  
EB: four...  
EB: ...  
 **\----carcinoGeneticist [CG] has entered the chat----**  
EB: i stick my face between your boobs. i make a super gross sound and begin motorboating you like my life depends on it. i am in boobtown, population me.  
EB: ppbpbpbpbpbppbpbppppbpbpbppbpbpbpbpbppbpbpbppbpbpbpbpbppbpbpbpppbpbpbpbpbppbpbpbppbppbpb  
EB: pbpbpbppbpAPUKGDSYHDSKJSHNFDKJ UO HMY GOD  
CG: USHUKDHDS  
EB: KARKAT WHAT THE FUCK  
CG: OH YES, ASK ME THAT LIKE I'M THE ONE AT FAULT HERE.  
EB: OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A PRIVATE CHAT!!!!!!!  
CG: WELL APPARENTLY SOMEONE DIDN'T DO THEIR JOB RIGHT, BECAUSE HERE WE ARE  
TT: KARKAT  
TT: Karkat. Out. Now.  
CG: OH, AND NOW SHE'S BACK TOO.  
TT: Dammit Karkat, did I not say I was sorry?!  
EB: whta??  
CG: LOOK, THIS ISN'T MY BUSINESS, I DON'T WANT IT TO BE MY BUSINESS. YOU CAN DO WHATEVER DISGUSTING THINGS YOU WANT TO EACH OTHER BEHIND CLOSED DOORS.  
CG: BUT  
CG: HERE'S SOME ADVICE:  
CG: IF YOU HAVE TO JUGGLE THIS AND SOME POOR UNFORTUNATE SOUL'S CONVERSATION AT THE SAME TIME, MAKE SURE WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO BEFORE YOU HIT SEND  
TT: I apologized!!  
CG: CHRIST LALONDE, WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO BE BUSY FOR A FEW MINUTES I DIDN'T REALIZE HOW BUSY YOU WERE  
EB: wait  
EB: a FEW minutes???  
TT: Not THAT few minutes!  
CG: OH, WHICH REMINDS ME  
CG: EGBERT, I BELIEVE THIS BELONGS TO YOU  
 **\-- CARCINOGENETICIST [CG] SENT ECTOBIOLOGIST [EB] THE FILE "HUMANSARELITERALLYDISGUSTING.TXT" --**  
CG: I WOULD HAVE JUST COPYPASTED, BUT BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY SHE GOT REALLY INTO IT BEFORE SHE REALIZED IT WAS ME  
CG: PLEASE, JUST TAKE IT SO I CAN DELETE WHAT HUMANS CONSIDER "EROTIC" FROM MY COMPUTER'S MEMORY  
CG: AND MY MIND  
CG: AND MY LIFE  
CG: GODSPEED, YOU WEIRD LITTLE SHITS  
 **\----carcinoGeneticist [CG] has left the chat----**  
EB: ...  
EB: well  
EB: that happened.  
EB: i gotta be honest rose, i don't exactly feel much up for this anymore.  
EB: but, uh, it was fun while it lasted?  
EB: rose?  
TT: ...  
TT:"i hope you're in the mood for sausage?"  
TT: REALLY, John?  
EB: :I  



End file.
